People like you are the reason I’m on medication. Comeback: And you swallow ;) 45. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. You are the load your mom should have swallowed. Me neither. (LMFAO) 49. When a "your mom" joke got turned into a "you're a big baby" joke: yakattack365 / Via reddit.com. I've had snappier comebacks from a bowl of Rice Crispies. You’re about as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle. Never be late with a good funny comeback again. If you want a good comeback go wipe it off your mom's face. Whoever told you to be yourself has given you bad advice. 21. I have better things to do than listen to you. 45. Here are five great comebacks for “ok, boomer” when it comes from a younger relative: I was going to give you a nasty look but I see that you’ve already got one. Insult: FAIL! 47. You ever see a comeback on social media that was just ~chef's kiss~? Of course I didn’t come here to insult you – I don’t need to be NEAR you to insult you. Boyfriend: Just because you have your period doesn’t mean you can be so mean. “That sounds like a you problem.” This is one of those good comebacks for when your kids are making their lack of planning your emergency. Why not take today off? Reminder: while we all need to blow off steam from time to time (moms especially! You have your entire life to be a jerk. Girlfriend: Oh well just because you have a dick doesn’t mean you can be one. 50. But if you want something up your ass, I'd be happy to shove my foot up it. 17. If you’re witty like our next friend, a failed pickup line doesn’t have to kill your conversation. Here is our list of comebacks for you to use the next time you really need one. Here are 10 Texts that always work, used by me and team TextGod.. Get the 10 Texts here for free. ), bullying or being mean isn’t cool.Save these roasting jokes and comebacks for the privacy of your own home, or for people who’ll understand that they’re just that – jokes.After all, their hilarity will be much better appreciated that way! Stupidity’s not a crime, so you’re … Oh I’m sorry. It’s impossible to underestimate you. Comeback: I can't exactly help you with your head. 46. Five comebacks for “ok, boomer” when a younger relative says it You may be able to escape the wrath of trolls online and coworkers if you’re retired, but your younger relatives may still say it to you to get on your nerves or make fun of you. And if you're reading these funny quotes and hilarious insults, I'm sure you have too. I believed in evolution until I met you. 48. #3: Tinder comeback → When your opener fails. 48. 19. - hhhdhdjjdhdgrbfbdhd Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 … What is a good comeback for the ''it was only a joke'' excuse? Comeback: You wish I was. BAZINGA! 46. Comeback: No one asked for your life story. You asked for my number and I said 1-800 kiss my ass. Funny comeback: It’s not me, it’s you. 20. Remember when I asked for your opinion? 47. You’re not that pretty to be this stupid. We've all been there: knowing the best comebacks to say after the argument is over. 17. Insult: You're gay. You're so ugly that I'm going to have to stop drinking, just in case I start seeing two of you. People often say it when they are confronted after being mean, it seems to me that people think its ok to be a c*u.n.t if they say ''it was only a joke'' after, no matter how much they have hurt the person. I don’t care what everyone else says, I don’t think you’re that bad. Do you want some fun jokes at the ready? 44. Your family tree must be a cactus ‘cause you’re all a bunch of pricks. Funny Comebacks: You know you really should buy some breath mints? 18. I’d give you a nasty look but you’ve already got one. 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